Shi Ming’s Death Causes Rift Among Father and Sons – Lingering Family Storm Raises Three Further Questions

Veteran Hong Kong artist Shi Ming passed away on March 21 at the age of 76. Outsiders were initially concerned that her 81-year-old ex-husband, Lee Ka Ding, and their twin sons, Lee Wing Hon and Lee Wing Ho, who had a recent falling out over family matters, might get into a confrontation at the memorial hall on April 22. Fortunately, the three maintained extreme restraint throughout, presenting the utmost decorum despite zero communication.

According to Hong Kong media, Lee Wing Hon looked solemn, taking charge of his late mother’s funeral arrangements; Lee Wing Ho stayed by, looking after his frail and visibly grief-stricken father Lee Ka Ding. It was only after the funereal banquet that Lee Wing Hon spoke publicly for the first time and revealed the reasons behind the family feud.

Previously, Lee Wing Hon insisted on carrying out his mother’s wish of “not allowing his sister-in-law to enter the memorial hall.” On the day itself, accompanying the exhausted Lee Wing Ho and their father was Lam Yu Him, who was also unable to enter the actual hall and could only express condolences with three bows at the doorway. Lee Wing Hon arrived early to arrange matters, accompanied by his wife Yan Pui Yu and their three children. When media questioned Lee Wing Ho about his wife being turned away, he responded with reddened eyes but politely declined further comment.

After the coffin ceremony, Lee Wing Hon carried his mother's photo, followed by Lee Wing Ho. This was a rare moment for the estranged brothers to appear together. However, even in close proximity, they never acknowledged each other and did not converse throughout.

The three went to the crematorium to bid Shi Ming farewell. After the ceremony, they each stepped over the ceremonial fire basin and immediately parted ways. Lee Wing Ho wept so much his eyes became swollen. They did not attend the post-funeral banquet (also known as a “purification banquet” or “reassurance banquet,” a traditional Chinese meal hosted by family after funeral and burial rites for attendees and those who helped with the proceedings). Lee Wing Hon said he had invited the others, but “if they don’t come, there’s nothing I can do.” Lee Wing Hon once again emphasized that excluding his sister-in-law from the hall was his mother’s wish, and when questioned whether this was a one-sided claim, he retorted, “Who said so? Would you know better than my mom and me? I already said I have witnesses.”

He also claimed that neither his father nor his brother contributed a cent towards Shi Ming’s funeral, and said reconciliation requires ‘effort from both sides,’ expressing that the family rift is unlikely to heal soon.

On the other hand, on April 24, Lee Ka Ding told the media that Lee Wing Hon was unmotivated, did not work, and requested over HK$50,000 (about RM25,300) per month to support his entire family. He also claimed Lee Wing Ho had invited Shi Ming to his wedding, but Lee Wing Hon had threatened, “If you go, I’ll beat the hell out of you!” The elders chose to endure in order to avoid trouble, and in the end, Shi Ming did not attend the wedding.

On the eve of Shi Ming’s funeral, Lee Wing Ho suddenly uploaded a wedding video from 2022 on his YouTube channel, but closed the comment section, interpreted as showing support for his wife and countering his brother’s accusations. The roughly 14-minute video revealed many previously unseen details about the wedding.

The footage shows intricately decorated settings bearing the couple’s English names “Agnes and Gregory,” as well as Lee Wing Ho in a blue suit sweetly interacting and sharing a kiss with his bride, who wears a white suit. Lee Ka Ding can be seen smiling throughout and taking group photos with friends from the entertainment industry, including TVB artists Joyce Tang, Angela Tong, Savio Tsang, and Tsui Wing, creating a joyful and warm scene. When interviewed at the time, Lee Wing Ho claimed there was no family discord. Now, the public release of the video is seen as his silent protest against his brother.

In addition, Hong Kong media outlet hk01 summarized several perplexing details hidden within this family storm, stirring public discussion.

After divorcing Shi Ming years ago, Lee Ka Ding experienced a new romance and was reported in 2020 to be dating a woman nearly 60, who already had grandchildren. He publicly admitted the relationship but said on the topic of remarriage that he would ‘let things take their course.’ Now, however, this late-life romance seems ambiguous. During both Shi Ming's memorial service and funeral, this girlfriend was nowhere to be seen. Combined with Lee Ka Ding’s current single living status as revealed by his son, it is unclear whether the relationship ended quietly or if she deliberately kept her distance during the sensitive period.

At the memorial, only Shi Ming’s actor brother-in-law, Dominic Tang, was seen arriving alone to pay respects; her younger sister was absent. On such an important day, her absence has sparked public curiosity about the relationship and changes between the two sisters during their lives.

Apparently, the feud between the Lee brothers largely centers around their respective wives. The younger sister-in-law, Lam Yu Him, who was barred from the funeral hall by Lee Wing Hon, was described by actor friend Savio Tsang present at the memorial as “very well-mannered and polite.” On the other hand, Lee Ka Ding once described his older daughter-in-law, Yan Pui Yu, as “less than three feet tall, but with three hidden knives in her belly,” yet at the funeral she was attentive to their three children and, according to Hong Kong media, showed all the qualities of a good wife and mother. What the two sisters-in-law are truly like has become a Rashomon scenario, with conflicting stories from both sides.